Official Texans vs Vikings Fake Game Thread, 9/1/2011

[Arky]

“Preseason doesn’t mean anything, unless you lose.”
- Defensive coordinator Wade Phillips, speaking to the crowd at the Team Luncheon about the Texans’ preseason success

Eheh, seems as though Wade inherited a bit of Bum's wit.

Well, this one really is meaningless unless you're a coach or bubble boy. No 1A starters tonight. Still, should make for some interesting drama as guys try to fight for that last roster spot....

[Arky]

Vikes win the toss and will receive.

Vikes bring the kickoff back to the 34 but penalty on the play against the Vikes. Starting at their 14 yard line.

[popanot]

I guess Joel Meyers doesn't realize Gerhart is Caucasian.

[chuck]

Braman is great at beating blocks and terrible at tackling. Man, this is frustrating.

[Arky]

Vikes rush for about 3 up the middle.

Ponder scrambles for about 12 or 13. 1st down.

Rush for about 1.

Ponder scrambles for about 11. Ball at the Viking 41.

Offside D Lewis, makes it 1st and 5.

Davis for about 3.

Braman chases Ponder out of bounds for a loss... loss of 2.

Ponder scrambles again for about 7, 1st down.

Pass out in the flat inc, but holding on Vikings backs it up 10. Makes it 1st and 20 at the Viking 47.

Rush for about 1.

Pass sails inc. Makes it 3rd and 19.

Pass over the middle gets about 10 so Vikings have to punt.

Punt is downed at the Texan 1.

[chuck]

I don't care if it's the ones, the twos or the fourteens, this team's return game is an absolute abomination.

[chuck]

I'm glad to see that Kubiak is in midseason form in terms of challenges. What an idiot.

You guys who are talking about 10-6, 11-5, playoffs, etc., forget that the head coach of the the team is a moron.

[Arky]

Challenge on the last play.... Texans challenged that the ball went into the endzone. Play stands as called, Texans lose a timeout.

Obie for no gain.

Pass over the middle to Townsel goes inc. Makes it 3rd and 10.

Obie gets about 5 so Texans to punt deep in their own territory...

Punt gets out to Texan 43 as not much on the return..

[Arky]

Ponder's pass is off the mark, makes it 2nd and 10 at the Texan 42.

Robinson for about 2 up the middle.

Pass over the middle nearly picked by Demps. Makes it 4th and 8 and Vikings have to punt.

Punt goes out of bounds at the Texan 3.

[Arky]

Obie for about 12 on the left side, 1st down. Ball at the Texan 15.

Dump off to Graham gets 5. 2nd and 5 coming up.

Obie for about 2 on the left side. 3rd and 3 coming up.

Pass over the middle to Townsel complete for about 20, 1st down.

Leinart's pass is complete to BJ for 20. Ball in Vike territory at their 40.

Obie for 5 up the middle.

Nice run by Obie for about 15 but holding on Dickerson negates it. Makes it 2nd and 15.

False start Texans on BJ. Back it 5 more.

Short pass to Townsel gets 5. Makes it 3rd and 9.

Leinart's pass almost INT'ed. Texans to punt.

Vikings bring the punt back to their 16.

[Arky]

Pass complete to Rudolph for about 7.

Ponder pressured still gets the pass complete downfield. Ball at the Vike 36.

Vikings rush for 5 on the right side. 2nd and 5 coming up.

End of 1st quarter

------------------------

On 3rd and 5, pass sails inc. Vikings to punt.

False start Vikings backs it up 5.

Again, false start Vikings backs it up 5 more.

Nice return by Holiday brings the ball back to the Texan 42.

[Arky]

Reverse to Dickerson gains about 14 or 15.

Leinart hit as he was passing, fumbles, but Texans recover. Makes it 2nd and 17.

Obie fumbles the handoff but recovers, loss of 2. 3rd and 19 coming up.

False start Texans makes it 3rd and 24.

Obie gets about 13 on the delayed handoff. Texans to punt.

Vikings return the punt to about their 15. Nice tackle by Barber.

[chuck]

Reverse to Dickerson gains about 14 or 15.


It was an end-around, damn it.

This has been an underwhelming offensive series.

[Arky]

Ponder's pass to Johnson complete for 17.

Robinson runs for big gainer. Ball is at the Texan 36.

Ponder nearly sacked by Dobbins but manages to get back to the LOS.

Dump off pass goes nowhere. 3rd and 10 coming up.

Pass to Johnson gets 12 and the 1st down.

Ponder scrambles for about 13 or 14 after busted play. Ball at the Texan 9, 1st and goal.

Robinson for 4. 2nd and goal.

Pass over the middle complete for the TD.

Vikings 7, Texans 0

6:25 left in the half.

[Arky]

It was an end-around, damn it.

This has been an underwhelming offensive series.

Whatever, Chuck.

[chuck]

Ponder's a lot better than I thought he was. He's far better than Leinart is. His balls arrive on time. Leinart's are almost always late. And Ponder can throw on the run while Leinart can't.

I've always found it curious that Kubiak is so fascinated with Leinart when he's really not a fit for the offense. Bob always talks about the spin on the ball from a lefty which I think is a non-issue. But what is an issue are the blocking schemes on the roll-outs. Not only is Leinart poor in the bootleg offense Kubiak loves so much but you're making your OL really extend itself.

[Keith]

If only these guys knew how to wrap up a QB when they get him 7 yards behind the LOS...

[chuck]

Whatever, Chuck.

There is a difference, a big difference, between a reverse and an end-around. You might say it's a 180-degree difference.

[Arky]

Holiday brings the kickoff back to the Texan 26.

Deep pass to BJ gets out to the Texan 48.

Shovel pass to Hill loses one.

Obie rushes for 5. 3rd and 6 coming up.

Leinart's deep pass sails inc. Texans to punt.

Vikes field the punt and run out of bounds at their 14.

[Arky]

There is a difference, a big difference, between a reverse and an end-around. You might say it's a 180-degree difference.

Chuck,

I really don't care when I'm typing 90 mph. If the announcer says "reverse", then that is what I put down. I know there's a difference between reverse, end around, misdirection, etc....

[chuck]

Chuck,

I really don't care when I'm typing 90 mph. If the announcer says "reverse", then that is what I put down. I know there's a difference between reverse, end around, misdirection, etc....

If Joel Myers doesn't know who Toby Gerhart is I'm not surprised that he doesn't know what a reverse is either. Mark V got it right.

Anyway, thanks for the PBP.

[chuck]

I thought Dobbins was supposed to be a good pick up.

[Arky]

Vikes rush for 5.

Deep pass goes inc. but they're gonna get McCain for PI. 1st and 10 at the Viking 48.

Ponder scrambles for about 10.

Vikes rush for 2.

Pass goes inc., Demps gets a hand on it. 3rd and 7 coming up.

Dump pass over the middle gets 5 or 6 but flag on the play. Penalty against Vikes back 'em up 15. 4th and 17 and Vikings have to punt.

Holiday fair catches at the 11.

[popanot]

Wish they'd play Yates with the second team. Even as a rookie he's better than Leinart and I'd probably feel better going with him if Schaub got hurt.

[chuck]

Wish they'd play Yates with the second team. Even as a rookie he's better than Leinart and I'd probably feel better going with him if Schaub got hurt.

I'm not sure I would have agreed with you before having seen this half. Whatever it is that separates the guys who are good or could be good from the guys who aren't and never will be is in evidence with regard to Leinart. He is not good and never will be. Yates might not be either for all I know, but I'm with you in wanting to see what he can do with some of the players who might actually play in the NFL one day.

[chuck]

In all fairness that was a nice throw in the face of a blitz. He had to wait for the TE to clear and he hit him is stride.

[Arky]

Pass to Graham gets 13. Ball at the Texan 24.

2 minute warning.

Pass to Graham gets 7.

False start on Texans (Pemberton). Back it up 5, makes it 2nd and 8.

Nice catch by Maehl for 5. 3rd and 3 coming up.

Pass to BJ good for a 1st down but flag against the Texans for illegal shift. 3rd and 8 coming up.

Pass to Graham is good for the 1st down as he goes out of bounds.

Pass to Holiday good for 13.

Pass to Maehl gets 6. Ball at the Viking 36. 34 seconds left in the half.

Timeout Texans.

Obie for 2.

Pass over the middle to Obie gets about 12 and the 1st down but Texans opt to go for the FG with 10 seconds left.

Rackers FG hits the post, no good. 5 seconds left in the half.

Vikes kneel it out.

Halftime.

Vikings 7, Texans 0

[Arky]

Halftime stats:

Passing: Leinart 11/14, 128 yards

Rushing: Obie 8/46

Receiving: Graham 4/43, BJ 2/43, Townsel 2/24, Maehl 2/12

Tackles: Dobbins 4, Nading/McManis/Reed 3 each, Lewis/Bulman/Nolan 2 each

Time of possession: Texans 13:48, Vikings 16:02

1st downs: Texans 9, Vikings 11

3rd down efficiency: Texans 3/7, Vikings 2/5

Penalties: Texans 7/64, Vikings 5/45

Redzone: Texans 0/0, Vikings 1/1

Turnovers: Texans 0, Vikings 0

Total yards: Texans 200, Vikings 185

[HPF Bob]

No TV access today so, thanks Arky for the PBP. Solid as always.

[chuck]

No TV access today so, thanks Arky for the PBP. Solid as always.

You don't feel obligated to thank me for the color commentary?

[popanot]

Man, Slaton's a goner.

[Arky]

Holiday downs the 2nd half kickoff in the endzone. Texans ball at their 20.

Yates in.

Obie hits the left side for a big gainer but holding on the Texans (Wallace) wipes it out. 1st and 20 coming up.

Pass to Dickerson over the middle gets 15.

Pass to Graham goes for nice gainer. 15 yards? Ball at the Texan 45.

Holiday for 1.

Pass over the middle to Hill goes inc. Makes it 3rd and 9.

Yates has the ball knocked loose as he backs up to pass and Vikings recover at the Texan 42.

[chuck]

ND doesn't know what a reverse is, either.

[chuck]

Ideally Reed would be distinguishing himself here.

[Arky]

Ponder scrambles for about 5, penalty on the Texans for facemask gives the Vikes 15 more. Ball at the Texan 22.

King rushes for about 4. 2nd and 6 coming up.

Ponder's pass goes inc. Makes it 3rd and 6.

Dump pass gets about 10, 1st down Vikes at the Texan 6.

Pass in the flat goes for 2. 2nd and goal at the 4.

Robinson runs it in for the TD.

Vikings 14, Texans 0

10:19 left in the 3rd quarter.

[popanot]

Haven't really been paying much attention to OL or DL, but I'd say Slaton, Demps, Barber and Braman are definite cuts. Slaton hasn't seen the field and Braman hasn't been in in awhile. Demps and Barber just suck.

Think it's pretty clear Dickerson and Johnson make it.

[Arky]

No TV access today so, thanks Arky for the PBP. Solid as always.

Thanks, Bob. :)

[Arky]

Holiday brings the kickoff back to the Texan 27.

Pass to BJ gets about 21.

Obie for about 3.

Big gainer by Obie takes the ball all the way to the Viking 12.

(Apparently penalty on the Texans as the ball is back at their 40 - Manning interview taking place).

Pass goes inc.

Yates gets sacked.

Texans punt on 4th and 27, Vikings return the ball to their 38.

[popanot]

Pemberton = gone.

[WMH]

[QUOTE=popanot;26168]Slaton hasn't seen the field[QUOTE]

Not that tonight would have saved him, but Slaton was a late scratch.

I don't know who that RT is (Hendrick?), but that guys will be flipping burgers next week. He's BAD....

[chuck]

The Texans are getting lit up all over the field.

[chuck]

[QUOTE=popanot;26168]Slaton hasn't seen the field[QUOTE]

Not that tonight would have saved him, but Slaton was a late scratch.

I don't know who that RT is (Hendrick?), but that guys will be flipping burgers next week. He's BAD....

I don't know who he is, either, but he should probably not sit next to Chris O on the way back to Houston.

[Arky]

King for about 5.

Jamison with the TFL -1. 3rd and 6 coming up.

Screen goes nowhere. Lots of pressure by Texans. Vikes have to punt. 6:08 left in the 3rd quarter.

Penalty on Vikes -5.

Holliday fields the punt and only gets a couple. Ball at the Texan 24.

[Arky]

Obie for 2.

Deep pass intended for Townsel is picked by the Vikings. Vikings ball at their 41.

[Arky]

Webb in at QB for Vikes.

Screen goes nowhere - penalty against the Vikes is declined.

King rushes for about 4. 3rd and 6 coming up.

Pass on the right side goes for a big gainer and a 1st down. Ball at the Texan 38.

King rushes for about 3.

King TFL by Lewis -5. Makes it 3rd and 12.

Webb scrambles for 12 and the 1st down.

Deep pass goes inc. 2nd and 10 coming up at the Texan 28.

King gets 9. 3rd and 1 coming up.

End of 3rd quarter.

Score remains:

Vikings 14, Texans 0

[chuck]

So you attack this defense by running up the middle and passing to the sidelines.

It will be a welcome change I guess. Over the last four or five years we've watched the Texans get beaten when teams run outside and pass over the middle.

[Arky]

Vikes rush right side for about 8 or 9. Ball at the Texan 10. 1st and goal.

King sweeps left for about 3.

Delay up the middle by King takes it into the endzone.

Vikings 21, Texans 0

[chuck]

Keo sucks, Barber sucks. It is incredible that this organization has literally never drafted a safety that deserved to play in the NFL.

That was number 38, by the way, not 28.

[Arky]

Holliday brings the kickoff back to the Texan 22. 13:41 left in the game.

Obie for about 10 on the right side.

Obie upended, gain of 1.

Pass to Maehl in traffic gets 6. 3rd and 3 coming up.

Yates scrambles for 4 and the 1st down. Ball at the Texan 44.

Dump pass Pauga too low, inc.

Dump over the middle to Graham gets 7 or 8. 3rd and 2 coming up.

Obie TFL -3 but flag on the play. Against Texans for illegal formation, declined by Vikings. Brings up 4th down and 5, Texans to punt.

Punt is fair caught by the Vikes at their 18.

[chuck]

Does Kubiak let the twos and threes practice during the week? I've been watching the Texans for ten years and have never seen a squad look as bad, confused, out of synch, poorly organized and poorly coached as the team I have seen tonight.

Not that I really care that all these guys who aren't going to be playing in the league tomorrow suck, but I'd love to see something that gives me some measure of confidence that the team is drafting and signing decent players and teaching them the system in an effective manner.

[Arky]

10:19 left in the game.

Vikes rush for no gain.

Again, rush for no gain. Makes it 3rd and 10.

Vikes go left side for about 3. Vikes have to punt.

Punt is brought back by Holliday for short gain (after a quick muff). Ball is at the Texan 47.

[Arky]

Short pass over the middle is dropped by Graham.

Pass to Dickerson, can't hang on. Makes it 3rd and 10.

Pass to Maehl gets 7. Texans to go for it on 4th and 3.

Pass to Maehl might have been deflected, goes inc. Vikes take over at their 46.

[Arky]

King goes right side for 8. 2nd and 2 coming up.

Rush up the middle by King gets the 2 and a 1st down.

King for 5. 2nd and 5 coming up.

Robinson sweeps left for 1. 3rd and 4 coming up.

Dump pass to right goes for about 6 and the 1st down.

King gets about 2 on the delay. 2nd and 8 coming up. Ball at the Texan 28.

Dump off pass to the back goes all the way to the Texan 9. 1st and goal.

King goes right side for 2.

2 minute warning.

[chuck]

Shiloh Keo is so bad I cannot believe it. What I can believe is that the Texans brain trust would draft a player like that. Hell, for all I know they're going to keep him on the team.

[Arky]

King for 3. Makes it 3rd and goal from the 4.

King stopped short at the 2. 4th and goal coming up. Vikes going for it.

King runs it in.

Vikes 28, Texans 0

47 seconds left in the game.

[Arky]

Kickoff is downed by Townsel in the endzone. Texans ball at their 20.

Tavaris Williams goes for big gainer up the middle. 38 yards. Ball at the Vikes 42.

Texans let the clock run out.

Final Score:

Vikings 28, Texans 0

Next up: Indianapolis Colts on 9/11.

[chuck]

Well, next week we can start watching the team get embarrassed in games that count.

[Nconroe]

Pretty sloppy game . Seems nobody got hurt.

Obgonya ran pretty good, hope he makes it somehow.

Looking forward to first real game and playoffs this year.

[chuck]

On a positive note I stuck around to listen to Rich's interview with Bryant Johnson and was really impressed with how he came across. I'm really pulling for him now; I hope he gets a chance to contribute. Two first round WRs from 2003. That would be odd.

[WMH]

Yep, that was pretty ugly....oh well.

The 1's and the 1's sprinkled with 2's looked pretty good, + no "major" injuries to anyone, so I am very happy with our preseason.

Very happy opening weekend is coming up, and we can get this train rolling.

Here's to hoping it rolls in the right direction this year. Either way, they should be VERY fun to watch.

KOOL-AID time!

[nunusguy]

I didn't think Leinert played that badly. He actually has a stronger arm than I realized, but not like I'm trying to compare it to Elway's or anything like that.
But he's definitely better than DanO, so so much for the value of a strong armed QB. And he'll stand in the pocket and take a hit.
I think they have 4 'backs on the roster given the uncertainty with our top 3,
2 of whom already have hamstring issues. And at this point I'm not even sure if Keo makes the PS, so perhaps that makes room for 4th round corner Roc ?
Say, speaking of rookie corners, what ever happened to Brandon Harris ? As a second-rounder, of course he'll be on the roster, but I've heard little about him this presaseaon ?
The vet WR they just brought in looks like an NFL WR so I guess along with
Dickerson that's your 4th & 5th WR.
Can't help but mention this top pick of the Vikings, QB Ponder. For a white-boy, that kid can flat run. And they say he's a quick study, so he might be starting for the Vikings before the year is over ?

[popanot]

The most encouraging thing to come out of this preseason, IMO, is the consistency at which the front-line was able to put pressure on the opposing QB. It seemed to occur regardless if it was the 1's or the scrubs playing. Hopefully that's a sign of a good scheme that the players have bought into and have complete confidence in. Anyway, it's extremely encouraging considering we haven't seen that in a long......well, never.

[nunusguy]

The most encouraging thing to come out of this preseason, IMO, is the consistency at which the front-line was able to put pressure on the opposing QB. It seemed to occur regardless if it was the 1's or the scrubs playing. Hopefully that's a sign of a good scheme that the players have bought into and have complete confidence in. Anyway, it's extremely encouraging considering we haven't seen that in a long......well, never.
Couldn't agree more Popanot. It seems a novel experience for Texans' fans, and just more fun to be able to have a defense to watch that pressures the QB. And I'd imagine the D-backfield also appreciates it.