November 4, 2008
Fighting Fair or Fairly Fighting?
by Keith Weiland
Keith@IntheBullseye.com

You probably heard by now, but in case you haven't, I'm about to take a long hot piss into your Cheerios. Our beloved saviour from Mittens, Matt Schaub, has suffered a torn MCL in his left knee and will miss the next four weeks.

And to make it taste even worse, the injury came as a result of a dirty late hit by Vikings defensive end Jared Allen. Yeah, there's the video here and here to prove it. Watch as Allen purposefully dives into Schaub's unsuspecting knee long after the pass has left his fingertips.

Nyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaa Kellyclarkson, this sucks!

Allen basically tore a page right out of the handbook on how to fight dirty. No, really, he did. I looked it up. He went right down the list posted at eHow.com on just how to fight dirty.

Step 1: Attack the weakness, strike the places on the body most vulnerable. After the head and the groin, both of which can be reasonably protected, the knee is the next most sacred part of a football player's body.

Step 2: Use the element of surprise. Allen dove into Schaub from behind, catching him completely unaware.

Step 3: Use your surroundings. Pretty evident, Allen used the hardest, thickest weapon available to him, his helmet.

Step 4: This step specifically suggests that a dirty fighter should attack the knees. 'nuf said.

Step 5: Have no shame. Use your opponents morals against them.

Sadly, Allen was able to walk free after sending Schaub to the sideline, as the Texans seem unwilling to reciprocate such atrocities. Remember when Travis Johnson taunted an unconscious Trent Green last year when Green went for his knee? Where were my Travis Johnsons in Minneapolis on Sunday?

Can't find them. What you can find in abundance around here are the Rosenchopper lovers quick to label Schaub one of those little fancy lads for suffering yet another injury. Nevermind that his injuries are ones administered by the likes of Albert Haynesworth, a Jonny Fairplay if there ever was one.

Regardless, Schaub's inability to play a sixteen game season not only hurts him, but it hurts all of us. There are shades of Chris Chandler here, a player with Pro Bowl ability and ceramic bowl fragility.

Chandler, who like Schaub was a third round pick, never played a 16-game season throughout a career that ohbytheway included a stop here in Houston caretaking the position for Steve McNair. The "chandelier" had some talent, sure, more than you probably remember actually. Chandler quarterbacked the Falcons - yes kids, the Falcons! - to a Super Bowl.

That kind of potential exists in Schaub. But only if his teammates do a better job sticking up for him.

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